Melani Blazer

Had an interesting convo this morning with two fellow writers, both pretty good friends of mine. I think the convo started with us all talking about our current writing progress, and I shamefully admitted I was stilling writing the *whispers* sex scene I’d omitted when writing the story.

I’d thought I’d made progress, then realized I’d locked Hero and Heroine all up …. without condoms.

*gasp* *boooo* *huffs* *throws book against the wall*

How DARE I?

Maybe cuz I’m 30-something, been married to the same man half my life and do not/have never slept around, but I don’t automatically THINK about those things. I might get bitchslapped into Monday when I say this–but I hate reading about them. It ruins the mood and pulls me out of the story.

This is my thought pattern. We don’t talk about the heroine getting her period. We also don’t talk about either hero or heroine having to go to the bathroom, with few exceptions where a) it’s a comedy or b) it’s really leading to other action. (confrontation, discovery, even sneaking out the window…) We don’t, as a rule, see heroine pull down her panties and actually pee. (Heaven forbid she had to do ’something else’. I.DON’T.WANT.TO.KNOW)

And honestly, I feel the same way about condoms. If I’m still reading the book come sex time, then I like the characters. I’ll believe she wipes front to back like a good little girl. I’ll trust she brushes AND flosses and that the hero actually scrubs between his toes. Unless told otherwise, I’ll even believe he calls his mom every Sunday, cleans the cat litter box and feeds his animals appropriately. I’ll also believe their intelligent enough to use a condom. But damn, damn and more damn, if a writer had to spell all that crap out in a book just cuz someone ASSUMES if it’s not there, it doesn’t happen, well, lets just say I’d read SOOOOO much less.

I know it’s been brought up, argued, debated and everyone has a very real and honest opinion. I personally, have a DAMN hard time believing a heroine tastes oh-so-sweet when the hero kisses her after a night’s sleep. (see above comment about being married half my life–I ain’t sweet pre-brushing, and God love ya honey, neither is he.) I deal. See it all the time. Pretend they both had a chance to sneak off for mouthwash or a bedside mint.

So… my book will have ONE condom mention. Some of my books have none. I’m not apologizing. It’s life. Deal. If you need them to use them, then they did. It’s fiction. Fantasy. Come up with your own betwen the lines stuff.